Reflective Temperaments

In many of the studies we have learned of this week, including the text, articles, and video clips, it is discussed how children are born with set genes for personality that can be developed, encouraged, or changed through positive or negative reinforcement. Parenting styles are also attributed to the development of these temperamental behaviors. In Thomas Hayden's article "A Sense of Self," he questions what can be responsible for these temperamental styles. He asks: "And how much of the personality of a child eventually develops has to do not with genetics or biology but with how Mom and Dad respond to each of them, or how they treat eachother?" This got me thinking about how differently children can behave around their own parents as opposed to other people. On the same note, how differently one child can act toward their mother versus their father. I had the opportunity to be a full time nanny over the last year in which I was caring for one female infant. She is a wonderful, bright, intelligent, cheerful little girl. I began looking after her when she was just 5 months old. Her father is a professional baseball player and would be gone for the season, from mid spring to fall. He left for his season two weeks after she was born, and returned two weeks after I had started as her nanny. During that five months, she had developed bonds with her mother, grandparents, uncle, and aunt. I don't know yet at what point is the most crucial for bonds to be made, but it must be in that time period. Her temperament around him-up until the point I left at 17 months of age- was always different. She treated him like an invader, or almost like a pesty little brother. She was more whiny, and irritable. The mother was also quite irritable with her husband, as she had felt abandoned during the early stages of child rearing. This could have been like a cue to her baby as how to act, even at such a young age. Babies, no matter how small, pick up vibes and reflect them. I'm sure it will change as she gets older, but it was truly an eye opening experience for me. So, what I wonder is how much a child's temperament can vary depending on who they are around and whether or not their temperaments will reflect those people's presence, or if that is a temperamental style all of it's own. And how much of the personality a child eventually develops has to do not with genetics or biology but with how Mom and Dad respond to each of them, or how they treat each other?